Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Their Mother the Crypt Keeper

I want to start off by saying that I truly love my children. With that being said... I truly want a vacation away from my children. 

I have two boys, age 11 and 10 and I am amazed every day that as much love as I feel for them, they are actually changing the color of my skin to a Crypt Keeper Gray. It's almost Halloween and I am using that as an excuse for now. Getting into the "Spirit of Halloween". 

I was diagnosed with Progressive MS a few years ago and was told that while I am strengthening my body, I also need to be as stress free as possible. That was the day I learned you can actually laugh to the point of seeing pixies. I don't care what anyone says.... I laughed so hard at that.... I SAW PIXIES!

What mother on the planet doesn't have stress? Add to that, I don't drive and the closest person to me that can take me anywhere is three hours away. That would be the husband that works in NASHVILLE. That's something I will get to at another time. 
I live in a small town in Indiana and there is NO public transportation near me. The closest thing to that, is a little old man in a golf cart that takes his grandchildren and some of their friends to a park.
I have taken my children to that same park and that lasted about 5 minutes. My kids are really in the computer generation and they don't know how to play in a setting that is not virtual. I do blame myself for that, but I only take so much of the blame. 
I tried my best to get them to actually enjoy this alien thing called "fresh air" but all they did was sneeze. No, now that I think about it, my oldest (who does have a sun allergy-of course he does), did manage to run for a straight 30 seconds as fast as he could screaming, "I HAVE DIRT IN MY SHOE". But hey....he ran.
I got them home and they had their tech "fix" and all was right with their world. In their "instant" world. 
They want to hear a song...download it. They want to watch a movie.....go to netflix. Friend can't talk on the phone, text them or email them. Youtube is the end all be all in this house. 

It's a very easy thing to just say, "Take it away from them". I have had many suggest that. I do feel I need to do something because it's starting to get to me. This NOW thing and them being stuck in the house with me so much. Because of the guilt I feel, I do let them get away with somethings they really shouldn't. But some times at the end of the day, I am just saying the alphabet in hopes that my brain has not liquefied. 
My youngest still is not aware that he has no umbilical cord attached to me anymore. I have tried to point that out to him, but to no avail. He waits for me by the bathroom door and if I take to long (some time I am just in the fetal in the bathtub), he will draw a picture of an eye and slip it under the door. All of a sudden I hear him say, (in a creepy red rum kind of way), "I see you". That's freaky! I really think that comes from living in a house with me day in and day out and not really going anywhere. I am really all he knows. He is my shadow and my cross. I do love him, but I fear if he doesn't learn to do things that doesn't involve me, this is going to happen.............
At his wedding, where he should be standing, I will be there instead. His bride will walk down the aisle, get to me....and then I will unhook a baby carrier that I have had to have custom made, have her turn around and strap it to her back...and then run like hell.

I love him DEARLY but there has got to be SOMETHING out there for him to do. The only thing he is into, is Naruto....which is a Japanese based cartoon that I can't find ANY action figure for. Found some once online, but when I showed it to him, of course he didn't like any of the ones they were selling. 

Lead as much of a stress free life as possible.....LOL I am working on it.

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